me first, what a concept
I hear a lot of talk about feeding our souls, and I believe it. I know I have to fill the well before I can write but I find that it is a very difficult thing for me to do. Call it whatever you want, feed the soul, fill the well, smell the roses, but it all comes down to one thing: Taking a few hours a week, in one block, to play, to relax, to do something non-writing related so that I can come back to my writing fulfilled. This means time alone, which I don't have a probelm with but it also means time spent and indulged on ME, not my husband or my children, just me. It is hard for us as women to believe that we deserve that time. I wonder, if men ever have trouble taking time for themselves away from family or friends?
Usually when someone reminds me to take time for me, to get to know myself, I rebel.
"Yeah, right, when do I have time to sit around and make a collage of what's important to me? When do I have time to go shopping for a special book to use as a journal and when would I have time to write in it anyway?"
Then I remember years ago being in the middle of a phone call with a friend, discussing an important emotional problem of mine, and there was a knock at the door. I told my friend I had to get the door. She asked why. I said because someone was knocking there. She said, "What's more important - you and the problem you're dealing with or someone at the front door?"
Since it wasn't very likely that it was Publishers Clearing House waiting to give me a big check, I knew she was right. And I recognized how easily I was all too willing to give up something for ME for the unknown. Some habits are hard to unlearn, but this is one I am working on.
Write on, right now.